things to leave behind

Since it has been a lifetime struggle to love myself, my emotions, my face, my body, the way I love others, I am attempting to leave behind self-doubt.

Does it matter if I am prettier or smarter or thinner than I am now? No, it doesn’t matter to the people who matter to me.

I am leaving behind the burden of guilt. I have served my time in my head, eaten my pain, threw it up, and started all over again with it. I am done.

I want to forget this year but it hasn’t been the only shit year. I need to be better again, this needs to be manageable again. And I am going to try to leave everything behind that has eaten at me for years, months, weeks. I have never had any need for it. I just have to remember that. Forever.

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